High & Mighty

I am the epitome of bipolarity.

Friday night, having my life end sounded appealing. Or, at least, envisioning driving a butcher knife in my left thigh brought a warped sense of peace.

On Saturday, i had two firsts. I rode BART out to the city. I dined out at night. Alone.

On our way to the train station i kept going, "Woo hoo! Taking the BART!" Denisse kept laughing. But i'm sure she was laughing with me. : D

Having dinner alone in a public place (food courts don't count) is a huge milestone. It's my way of saying, "I'm 36, i'm alone, and i'm okay with it. Bite me!"

And damn it, i really, really wanted sushi at my favorite place in Hayward. And it was on the way home from Denisse's. I just don't "happen to be in the neighborhood" that often.

The sushi chef, who has known me and my brother and Elsie for over a decade and a half, gave me a free roll. Yes, it took courage to put myself out there, but i did the right thing. (And not because i scored freebies!) I felt really empowered. And the extra, extra spicy tuna made me cry. But i couldn't be prouder.

Earlier in the day, it was an absolute high to discover the farmer's market at the Ferry Building on Pier 2. We witnessed giant leeks, conjoined twins of a tomato, and wild varieties of fungi - mushrooms that totally blew our mind. (No hippie pun intended!) They came in all shapes and sizes, and there were yellow and pink ones. One that looked like a funky 'do was called Lion's Mane. So cool! We had no idea.

And seeing happy humans and canines all around whilst savoring the sensation of see breeze on your face (breathing in the unique decay that was the ocean) was just wondrous.

I stopped in my tracks to take in the scenery. "What are you looking at?" Asked Denisse.

"The modern marvel that is the Bay Bridge," i replied. We laughed. But i did mean it. She didn't have to know that.

On the way to Union Square we happened to catch the St. Patty's Day parade on Market Street. We felt anything but festive in our black outfits. But having been there is like being part of history!

(I'm tellin' ya, i'm having a high!)

Sunday morning. Again, could not sleep in. I hopped out of bed at 6:34 and headed over to the gym. It nevered occurred to me that they didn't open till 8. So i shopped for groceries instead. And by groceries, i mean Coke Zero and frozen entrées.

Once i was done putting everything away and updating my iPod playlists, i headed back to the gym, and worked out like a fiend.

Between more floor exercise at home and hitting the shower, i sent Denisse like a dozen messages.

(Did i mention i was high?)

Went to dim sum with my brother W and his. Made plans to go out for dinner to which Elsie might invite friends.

"Sure!" i enthusiastically responded even before she was done making the suggestion. W cracked a knowing (but approving) smile - i was way hyperactive and way cheery.

After luncheon, shopped and bought a bunch of clothes i don't need. All the while trodding around in a twill mini which i look pretty damned good in, now that i work out like a fiend. (This coming from a slacker who skipped from two weeks before Thanksgiving to two weeks after Valentine's!...)

If the unquenchable desire for new clothes stems from the need to showcase my bod, i hope i don't get fat again! : P

And now that i've uploaded my weekend pix, there's nothing left to do but wait. But I can't just sit here. I have to look for the next thing.

One might say my mountains have gotten higher, and my valleys lower. It's enigmatic.

Yep, it's gonna be a lo-o-ong way down. The higher the climb, the ouchier the fall.