All Is Fair In the Pursuit Of Happiness

This was an interesting weekend.

On Saturday Denisse and i went down to Santa Cruz. It felt like a little day trip, "just the girls". Denisse is one of the few people i can shop with without anxiety. If you only knew how deep my neurosis runs, you'd know this is a great compliment. Our excursion also served as vindication over guys, once again. And, strolling down Pacific, 1 in 5 passers-by looked stoned to me. Doesn't get cooler than that!

York II emailed me this week. First that gesture restored my faith in the sheer kindness of humankind. For, like, an hour. To think that someone reaches out just to say, "Hey...", without expecting anything in return. Then i picked up on the flirtatious vibe. He probably just wants sex.

Damned cynicism. Who am i to judge, when i'm pathologically flirtatious myself? I can't even connect to someone who doesn't flirt back.

Saturday night Denisse and i went clubbing in beautiful downtown San Jose. You have to hand it to the city of San Jose. The couple of joints Denisse and i have graced beat all those we've been to in the city, hands down. So much hipper, and the music actually moves you to the point of Happy Feet. And there are places to sit! OMG, what a concept!

Last night was definitely my happiest clubbing experience to date. So many attractive girls, scantily clad. And good dancers too, both guys and gals. That's always fun to watch. I walked around like a kid in a candy store. Had a smile on my face you couldn't wipe off. I told Denisse i find myself checking out girls way more than guys.

"Is that weird you think?" I asked Denisse.

"Depends..." Replied a hesitant Denisse.

I got what she meant and laughed. "I'll ask my therapist," i said.

Then we updated each other on our recent love life (or an absence thereof - on my part anyway).

Incidentally, Matt had just emailed me earlier that day to promise bringing by my earrings on Monday. How about checking with me first to see if it's a good time for me? He's unbelievable.

I wrote back, "Don't worry about the earrings." What i really wanted to say was, "Keep them. If you can't find a place, i'll tell you where you can put them."

On most nights out i get tired within an hour, but on this night i just wanted to keep groovin'. If ever there was a time i had lost myself on the dance floor, this was it. Denisse and i danced with a bunch of strangers of both genders, rainbow-roll hip grinding and all that jazz. A girl's long hair swang, brushing across my cheek. Everybody was fragrant in body heat. Denisse got really hammered and kept going, "Woo!" We laughed so hard.

But on the way home Denisse did need me to pull over. She hurled right in front of the HP Pavilion. I told her that was quite a statement.

"I'm never drinking again," Denisse said this morning. "I had a piece of your bread earlier to sooth my stomach..."

"Oh my God do you know how old that bread is?" I exclaimed.

"It seemed fine," Denisse said. "I looked at it."

Oh, good, she checked for mold.

This evening she informs me by text that she is sick again.

Um, perhaps it's the 5-week old bread? Just pure conjecture.

I do hope she gets well soon. She's not a lot of fun to talk to when she's sick. (OK, i'm a horrible person.)

And i wonder why JD hasn't called. Must be grappling with depression. (JD would LOL.)

This evening I read a mind-and-eye-opening article on bisexuality by Jennifer Baumgardner, adapted from her new book Look Both Ways. Approximately 60% of bisexuals ages 18-44 are female. Baumgardner's view on having no gender preference is how i've always felt about love in general. You need attraction, you need affection, you need a deep connection. It's rare to find all three in a person. And that's just it. You're looking for a person.

It's really amazing how literary works transform a moment, and a mindset thereafter. Upon reading the article i felt strangely in harmony with the universe. Not like an oddball salmon struggling with all its might to swim upstream. Eh, let's face it. If i were a salmon i probably wouldn't have the will to swim upstream. I'd probably just let the currents sweep me away, and embrace my destiny of becoming sashimi, sitting neatly beside pickled ginger and a glob of wasabi.