Ruff

Dropped off Alley at boarding this morning. As soon as we exited the car we heard dozens of dog howling bloody hell. Foreboding.

Upon entering the building, I smelled urine. Before I was able to process the thought, "Oh, great...", Alley crouched down, advent to peeing on the welcome mat. (Quite a statement.) I yelled out of shock. I don't think she actually did it, but later I did spot an employee mopping up the area.

The waiting area was quite chaotic. It felt like no one was in charge. Though, before long, a young woman approached us, smiling as she said hi. Without asking names or anything else, she took the leash off my hand and proceeded to lead Alley back ways. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do, so I blindly followed. Alley kept turning around to look at me quizzically. Just as the young woman was gonna disappear with Alley behind closed doors, I asked, "Am I supposed to follow you?"

Just then, a man seemingly out of nowhere who obviously worked there and had a sense of authority about him told me, "No, no. You wait there." And pointed to the waiting area by the entrance.

"I thought I was supposed to get her leash back..." I said.

"You'll get it," said the man, and again gestured me to back off.

I waited along with a few other humans, some with canines. A female employee appeared and asked, "Who's next?"

I absolutely hate when they do that. The customers are supposed to police themselves? We don't know what's going on. I sure as hell didn't. How about a system? How's that for an idea?

The young'un who had ushered Alley away returned then and handed me her leash. "Did you bring her food?" She asked.

I handed over the heavy grocery bag I had prepared the night before and gave instructions on quantity, feeding time and frequency.

She smiled and nodded without taking notes. Another customer was doing the same with another employee. How could they keep track? Kinda like when you're trying to count and someone throws some random numbers at you, messing you up?

Then the girl proceeded to dismiss me. In disbelief, I asked, "That's it? No paperwork?"

"There'll be paperwork when she's picked up," the girl informed me.

I felt traumatized. It was all so abrupt and rushed. I didn't get to say goodbye. And if I felt this way, i could only imagine how Alley felt. I thought I'd get a moment to say something along the lines of "Be good. Don't give these good people a hard time. We'll come and get you before you know it.", you know, to help her feel safe, not abandoned. But perhaps there was nothing I could've done to comfort her. Anything I might've said might have been futile.

I felt like I had gained Alley's trust just to betray it. To think that her last memory of me was my scolding her.

On the drive home, it felt weird that I was able to see in my rear view mirror since Alley's head wasn't blocking it. Her wide-eyed face haunted me.

Back at RJ's, I hung Alley's leash on the wall where it belonged. The house felt so quiet without her panting and the gentle clank of the metallic tags on her collar as she'd move about. On the other hand, i felt incredible peace without her playing shadow ALL the time, monitoring my every move. Oh, a true shepherd that one is.